Life & Times of Ghetto P.

Highlights from the big city

2010-07-22T11:59:00.000-07:00

Ha ha ha..I can't write big city without laughing because Salem is by no means a big city, but it is bigger than Bellingham so I guess it should be big to me. Also the word "Highlights" makes me fondly remember my subscription to the amazing childhood magazine that included several word and picture puzzles to keep me busy for hours. Okay, back to reality - here are some of the highlights of the great city of Salem (so far):

1. Cinebarre - I know other cities have this, but Bellingham does not and it is wonderful. A movie theater, restaurant and bar in one? Perfect.

2. Salem farmer's market - I immediately felt at home as I visited all the booths, checking out the local fare.

3. Mexican foods - okay this is random, but it is one of the reasons Salem is a city after my own heart. I love Mexico (I've only been twice but have loved it each time) and it is no secret that Salem has a large latino (mostly Mexican) population. Here's why it's great. You walk into virtually any grocery store and can get the same foods you can get in Mexico! My favorite are Canelitas - these delicious cinnamon cookies.

4. NO TAX! Okay I realize this isn't exclusive to Salem, but I am loving this fact of Oregon life. You go out to dinner and order a $9.99 entree and it's actually $9.99! So simple, but so wonderful.

5. The beach - Just under an hour away is Lincoln City and the Oregon Coast. It's so nice to go to a real beach - not just the rocky shore of Bellingham Bay. I could go there every weekend because it's so beautiful.

So there's a sampling of Salem life. Much, much more to come.

Coffee Woes

2010-03-19T09:38:00.000-07:00

Oh how I love coffee. And on top of that, I love me a caramel americano...from Avellino. Delicious, right? Oh, but the pain and suffering I have endured during my last two Avellino visits is making me second guess my beloved caramel americano.

First visit: I walk down to get some coffee with Emily for me and Jason (because I'm a nice coworker). I order two tall caramel americanos. We sit down with one of Em's friends, chatting and waiting. After about 5 min, Em has her drink, there are no more drinks coming, and the barista is in the back. I think, "Um, did they run out of caramel? Are they getting more beans? Where did they go?" So I go up to the register - no cups waiting. The cashier comes up after a couple minutes and I sheepishly say, "Oh, um, are my drinks...." but I don't even have to finish because the cashier hurriedly grabs two cups and does her prep thing...I don't even have time to notice that the caramel bucket isn't out...

So I head back to the office, two drinks in hand. It isn't until I am back in my office that I take my first drink of sweet, rich, caramel-y coffee goodness...but wait! Something is missing. There is no caramel-y goodness....it is caramel-less. I immediately run out to the front to confirm my fears - did Jason have any caramel in his? No. I can feel some slight rage coming on and I begin to rant to Jason who, after a few minutes of listening, calmly picks up the phone - "Hi, my coworker just bought two americanos from there..."

Oh no, I really didn't mean to "make waves." It's not actually a big deal. I take it back! The conversation ends with Jason giving our names to the person on the other end (I'm thinking for Avellino's unruly customer shit-list). "We have two free drinks next time," he says. Although I'm a little uncomfortable with it, I'm also a little elated. Woohoo! Free coffee! ...I just hope they don't spit in it.

Second visit: Three days later, Jason and I head down to Avellino (I made him come with me, knowing I would never have the courage to actually mention the free drinks myself). Once again, I look forward to that sweet cup of caramel-y goodness. When we're up to order, Jason mentions the freebees and orders a caramel americano. I say I'll have the same, but with EASY caramel. Now, a little history here: the past few months I've been asking for half the caramel they usually put in - and it's always met with the barista saying "ok, easy caramel." So when I'm ordering my FREE americano, I happen to say "easy caramel." I thought, hey, I know the lingo now. I'm an official Avellino regular.

After ordering, I see the barista take a giant scoop of caramel from the bucket - we're talking about double what they usually put in. I figure that must be Jason's americano and I've just been getting half as much caramel for so long that I've forgotten how much the regular amount is. I take a look at the order of the cups, however, and it's looking like the mega-caramel one is mine. Apparently to this barista, EASY caramel equals EXTRA caramel.

So I wait for my drink just to be sure, and wow, it is beyond sweeeett! Not good sweet either. I don't have the balls to turn down a free Americano, so I take it, knowing that I'm actually having my dessert for breakfast today, but thankful for free coffee nonetheless. From now on I'll stick to saying "halfthecaramelyouusuallyputinagrandeamericano."

Avellino, I still love you. Just make my coffee right next time.

Winter is here?

2010-03-11T14:14:00.000-08:00

Just when I was ready to break out the flip-flops and capris, good ol mother nature gets PMS-y and throws a winter storm our way. Seriously, I thought my window was going to shatter from all the wind last night, not to mention the freezing cold ice legs I had all night long (I had already put my extra "winter" comforter away. duh.). And then, all day today my fingers are like little icicles and my nose must be near frostbite by now. Stupid winter.

Dear Winter,

You officially have 10 days to get the eff out. Stop blowing your nastiness on me, drenching me with freezing rain, and turning my perfectly good appendages to ice. You are no longer welcome.

Sunshine,

Turn off brain

2010-02-24T09:15:00.000-08:00

Seriously, thinking too much is actually a sickness. And what the hell are dreams? I just experienced night four of a disturbing, unsettling recurring dream - just my worst fears realized, no big deal. I hate it I hate it I hate it. Turn off brain! I can at least distract myself during the day, but what can I do at night to stop my brain from focusing on painful things. And then I wake up in a sweat, feeling sick to my stomach wondering if it's ever going to end. And then I can't help but have those words and images in my brain all day long, only to lead to another night of restless sleep. I will be asking God about this whole dream (or nightmare) thing when I die. What's the purpose? Really? I'd like to know...

Oregon Bound!

2010-02-16T11:37:00.000-08:00

It's official folks - I'm moving to Oregon!

I've wanted to do this for a long time and finally the timing is right. I haven't nailed down the exact date, but it's looking like mid-June. I've decided on the Salem area for several reasons:

A) It's cheap...well, a lot cheaper than Portland (and Bellingham for that matter)
B) Fun people live there - aka Stephanie E. Almeida
C) It's close to family - Salem is 30 min away from my brother's house in Portland
D) Woodburn Outlets are just a hop, skip and a jump from Salem. I love outlets....

Leaving Bellingham will be hard, but I'm excited for this new adventure

Thankful

2010-02-11T21:03:00.000-08:00

I just really need to have some positivity in my life right now...what better way to do it than celebrating all that is going RIGHT in my life.

I am so thankful for:
1) Middle School Compass - those kids are amazing. They are dealing with crazy hard things and surviving. They are hillarious also. And even though they can be a lot to handle sometimes, I love getting to see them every Thursday night.
2) Friends - I am super leaning on my friends right now and they are actually amazing. I love that I have their support even when I'm not the best support back. It's nice to know that there are people in my life who will be there for me no matter what.
3) Jesus - For real. Don't know what I'd do without him in my life.
4) A Job - Okay, so I don't exactly have my dream job right now, but I'm thankful that I at least have a steady income because I know there are so many people right now who are struggling just to survive
5) Health - I'm alive and I'm (at least fairly) healthy. Can't take that for granted. I'm glad I can move and do active things (within reason). I'm working on this a lot lately and it feels really good.

I'm sure there are many more things I could list, but this is a start...

Feeling Bloggy

2010-02-11T17:56:00.000-08:00

I think blogging comes in waves and I'm starting to get that itch to post some word vomit. I hate when people say word vomit. Don't you? Ah, well, it's just as well. I will be making an effort to blog more...simply for my own well being. Read if you wish.

I heart rap music

2009-06-11T09:20:00.000-07:00

Ok, well, I love rap music in the same way you love Full House reruns. You know most of it is crap, but it reminds you of being a kid, of good times, and it makes you happy. Just because I grew up a little ghetto, it aint no shame that Dr. Dre and Snoop bring me back to the fourth grade - a simpler time.

Lately I've been thinking about different songs and how funny they'd be if they were rap songs - -I'm not talking about high quality rap here. I'm talking about the "I'm on a boat" rediculously dirty type. And sometimes it's a disney song, or a Kelly Clarkson song, and an occasional worship song (think "I'm here to fu%$in meet with you..."). I know it's not right, and I usually don't "rap" them out loud, but it is VERY entertaining to me. In fact I suggest you try it sometime.

Last Days

2009-03-10T10:01:00.000-07:00

Weird. I have one week, that's 5 working days, left at my job. Now there's the battle of wanting to get a bunch of stuff done and wanting to take a nap and say oh well, I won't work here next week. Good thing I'm such a great person - I will not nap (however I am blogging on the clock), but I will work....after I make a list of things at my desk I have accumulated in the last year and a half:
1) A very right leaning plant (physically, not politically)
2) A fake "Dundee" award for the whitest Keds
3) A small plastic Care Bear figurine
4) Three empty vases
5) Two containers of body butter
6) One fake bird
7) A giant bottle of Ibuprofen
8) A candle lighter
9) One dusty dayplanner
10) A tile coaster

Very exciting things...

Springy

2009-02-19T12:57:00.000-08:00

It's really looking all springy outside and I don't mean in the slinky kind of way. It's sunshiny and it smells like plants and it's not freezing cold.

My optimist side says, "Beautiful, spring has sprung, enjoy!"

The pessimist side says, "Dingus, you're stuck inside anyway so you're not going to be able to enjoy it. This is how summer will be too...muhahahaha."

My realist side says, "Enjoy it while it lasts. It's only February and you know spring doesn't really come in Bellingham until May."

I want to go for a walk.

Working it out

2009-02-06T10:21:00.000-08:00

Excuses I have used in the past couple weeks to not work out:
-I was sick
-I had the day off
-I was too tired
-Too sore
-The DVD player wasn't hooked up
-I didn't have any clean workout clothes
-I overslept

Reasons I should work out (besides the obvious "it's good for me" thing):
-Bob from the biggest loser is hillarious on the workout DVDs (Example: "You have two legs and you need to stretch them both 'cause we're going to be working those today, mmkay." - okay that actually doesn't sound funny typed out, but when he says "mmkay" he sounds like a black lady from the south...hard to exlpain)
-Nicole will buy me coffee if I get in all my workouts for the week...I could just lie though (muhahahaha!)
-I feel like I have instantly lost 10 pounds because I am just THAT good at workin it out.
-That sausage egg breakfast sandwich at Starbucks is WAY less appealing after a morning workout
-I will be able to fight off anyone who messes with me because I'll be so strong (you never know when a repeat of 8th grade will occur)

So many reasons to work out...do you have any other good reasons? I need more motivation in case I'm too tired/sick/dvd not hooked up/sore/overslept again.

Stimulate my economy please

2009-01-30T10:22:00.000-08:00

I have Obama hope, but I also have some worry. When the economy starts messing with my life, I get a little upset. So, I hoping Obama's package will save the day (stimulus package you freaks), but I think it's going to take a little more than what he's proposed. It's a step in the right direction I guess. I think if I were to propose a stimulus plan, it would look a little something like this:

$50 million to Rebound of Whatcom County

$20 million to the BSBs

$20 million to the Better Lovers

$100 million to benefit people who work hard at crappy jobs and should be paid more

and about $50K to me personally to pay off all debts and go shopping

Okay, see why didn't I get elected president?

OH OH I feel a pig picture coming on...

Presidential Pig

Work is fun!!

2009-01-08T15:07:00.000-08:00

Ok, that's not totally true. Do people really like their jobs? I mean, I like the people I work with, and I have a good job, but do I really like going to work? Not really...

Now I'm all "Why don't I like my job? Do I need to go back to school? What would I study? What do I want to do?" Blah,blah,blah. And the answer to all of those is "I don't f'ing know."
Sweet. Guess I'll just not like going to work for awhile.

I think followers of my blog should suggest a couple career pathways for me.
My ideas?
Interior Designer
School Counselor
Human Resources person (i.e. Toby from the Office)
Professional artist (ha!)

What are yours?

End of Christmas, beginning of health

2008-12-31T12:15:00.000-08:00

So we took down our decorations and tree last night (sigh). I guess it had to come sometime. Our tree was looking a little on the parched side. I also realized recently that tomorrow (New Year's Day) is the last paid holiday off until memorial day. Boo. On the bright side of things, I am now healthier than I was yesterday. Yes, I have begun a health binge yet again. Okay, but it's not a binge this time: it's a lifestyle change. Ha, I'm getting healthier by the minute. 2009 marks the year when I turn toward great health and prosperity.

Ways I will make sure I achieve my health goals:

1. Nicole will buy me coffee on Fridays if I've worked out 5 times that week (mon-fri)2. Rachel will walk with me on the weekends to help me move more

3. Kristen will help me control portions and plan healthy meals

4. Whitni will make sure I'm buying plenty of fruits and vegetables and snacking healthfully

5. I'm blogging about it right now so everyone knows and I HAVE to stick to it
6. I'm going to dominate Nicole's fitness success with my amazing results.
7. I have a calendar with my workouts scheduled on it and when I complete my workout, I get a star sticker! Who can resist that?

2009 = The Best Year Ever!

Blog facelift & Sickening sugar

2008-12-10T12:20:00.000-08:00

You likee?

I decided I was bored with the old look. I wish there were more layouts to choose from.

So my life for the past week has been baking and decorating and melting and sugaring... I'm making my Christmas presents this year and I have now reached the baking portion. I have made approximately:

54 Sugar cut out cookies

40 Chocolate covered peanut butter cookies

40 Almond joy clusters

45 Peanut butter balls

and a whole vat of White chocolate cranberry popcorn crunch

I actually got nautious when smelling everything last night. The great thing about it is that I have had no desire to sample any of the treats.

Ugh, sorry everyone, for Christmas I'm getting you fat.
Goodbye healthy heart! (wow, that's a little Grinchy).

O Christmas Tree!

2008-12-08T16:24:00.000-08:00

I love love love a hundred times more love real Christmas trees and I haven't had one for about oh, 15 years. That's right, my mom gave them up for a two-footer fake tree when my brother moved out of the house and it was just the two of us (lame mom!).
I am happy to announce that yes, I have a tree! A real one. It's a little non-traditional and slightly squat, but I super love it.

Some decorations currently on the tree:
Giant letters C, K, W
Underwear (decorative and tasteful of course)
Bush patch and barbell chain necklace from middle school
Va-j-j visors (don't ask)
A pink feather boa (actually that's the tree skirt)
A sparkle-tastic belt
Giant fake flowers
...Just to name a few.

It looks magical and surprisingly Christmas-y.

You should get a real tree too. Just don't be like these people

The Jobens

2008-12-02T09:13:00.000-08:00

Home away from home. I spent last week with a fun little fam I like to call the Jobens. Also known as Lulu, Chuck Deisel, Nickitynangle, Kyky the Clown, Ryry, and D-Rock. I may have made some of those up. I did not make up the absolute JOY of spending Thanksgiving with this lovely group of people.

Here is a list (not exhaustive) of why I love the Jobens:

1) The laughing - I am constantly laughing when I am with the Jobens- whether it's because Kyle just smashed a bag of Nicole's chips in front of her, Lulu just riled Tucker up and then called him something regal, Ryan put on a dance performance (along with the DDC), Charlie made an ugly pose, or Derek competed with himself to finish a meal. It's the most funniest time ever.

2) The animals - Cooper, Tucker, Sassy, Ivory & Spooky - they are the best.

3) The competitions - I thoroughly enjoyed the one where we all had to make the weirdest noise or maybe it was just an animal noise - I don't know but all of the sounds were amazing. Also I enjoyed when we played Scattegories and people were yelling across the room - it was fantastic.

4) The snack drawer - Always stocked with the tastiest trendiest snacks - mmm, delicious.

5) The bonus room - From a fridge stocked with drinks to the softest couch in the world to the ginormous TV, this is a room I like - there's always fun things happening in that room too.

6) Shopping with Lulu- It's nice to know that even though Nicole didn't inherit her mom's fashion sense, I can power shop with Lulu and receive great advice.

7) Sports - I actually love watching sports, but I don't have people around me who do most of the time. It's nice to be inundated with sports while at the Jobens - from tv sports to school team sports to live action in the living room sports. It's a good time.

8) Visiting the magic of Puyallup. They have a new Target - it's pretty amazing. Also, I like to see Mt. Ranier everytime we leave the house. "Hi Purple Mountain Majesty"

9) Just being. Sometimes it's nice to just be somewhere and not have any expectations - I mostly feel that way while at the Jobens

10) Crazy times - With a family of six, five pets, and a family of six's friends, things get crazy sometimes. But I think I like that because there's so much life - it's like a life explosion and THAT is exciting.

Make money money, make money money money!

2008-11-21T09:33:00.000-08:00

That's right. I'm on a mission. It's all about the Benjamins. Well, it is when you're in debt. My car loan, my student loans, some unmentionable credit card debt from my student days - it's the American way. I, however, am now a fiscally-responsible ghetto pig and I am about to dominate my debt like I dominate the streets. That's right. Yeyah.

First, I don't buy crap just to buy it anymore - like when I bought a new cell phone just because my old one didn't have a camera with zoom...honestly, how often do I take pictures with my camera? Almost never.

Second, I keep track of things. Everything is accounted for, even that $1.90 coffee I bought last week - it's in the budg.

Third, I moonlight as a profesh childcare worker and a life-giving plasma donator. Pretty much I help raise the struggling younger generation and save lives in my spare time. The extra cash -> straight to savings...or debt...or coffee. No, not coffee. Crap. Financial Breakdown!!!

No, I'm in control.

Feel free to send me additional cash at your leisure.

Will give ghetto pig advice for money!!

I'm not poor, I'm po. Can't even afford the o and the r....

Bring it on down to Turkey-ville

2008-11-20T12:25:00.000-08:00

As a society, I really don't think we dress up in costume enough. That's why on most occasions with my friends, there is a costume involved. A certain group of friends referred to as the BSBs held a Thanksgiving extravaganza where some choice costumes were worn.

Can you tell what I am?

If not, you're not ghetto enough. Obviously, I'm mashed potatoes and gravy (Do you see the pat of butter? Do you recognize the white pillowy-ness? The gravy streaming down?)

Some other noteworthy costumes were

Pilgrims:

Indian:

Sparkling Cider:

For actual Thanksgiving I plan on being Plymouth Rock.

CHRISTMAS!

2008-11-14T09:26:00.000-08:00

Who's excited? You know, don't tell me it's too early because people who grew up in the ghetto like myself need reasons to celebrate life - Christmas is joyous forever.

Here are some ways I have already begun celebrating this joyous season:

1. Getting out Christmas decorations

2. Shopping for/making gifts

3. Listening to Christmas music

4. Planning holiday events

5. Budgeting for Christmas expenditures

6. Visiting Santa's workshop at the mall

7. Looking for elves

8. Using only red and green paper and pens at work

9. Thinking of things I don't need for Christmas but would definitely like

10. Wondering if overweight old men wearing red could actually be Santa in everyday clothes

11. Watching Christmas movies (so far: The Santa Clause, Santa and the 3 Bears, National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation)

12. Looking Christmas-y (Today I'm wearing a green shirt and my, uh, cheeks are red)

13. Volunteering to help people (well, I do that everyday because I'm so thoughtful, but it is Christmas spirit-filled)

14. Looking at the sky often and thinking, "It might snow tonight!"

15. Baking sweet treats

I'm such a Christmas-pig.

Stephanie E. Almeida

2008-10-09T09:17:00.000-07:00

Well hello blog. Updating is just not my thang. When something extroardinary happens, however, I am quick to expound on it. Extroardinary thang of the moment: Stephanie E. Almeida of Spokane, WA, currently residing in Eugene, OR with her husband Ricky and two cats: Clyde and Suki. Stephanie is fantastic - here are some facts:

1. I have known Stephanie since 7th grade - she helped me in science labs. Very smart.

2. Stephanie and I won a Hewlett Packard science competition in ninth grade and earned a ginormous trophy for our school.

3. In high school, Stephanie was a gymnast and a sprinter in track...very athletic.
4. Phone conversations between us before we could drive would often go to: "Man, it's going to be so fun when we can just drive to Zips anytime we want."
5. There are few things that brought Stephanie as much joy as a blue cheese burger from the Sawtooth Grill in Spokane.
6. Stephanie has had the unfortunate experience of running into people who have never met anyone/talked to anyone who was black. Questions she has answered include: "Does your hair grow?" and "What part of Africa are you from?" Awesome white people. Awesome.

7. Stephanie has a secret love of fuzzy posters and beef sticks.
8. In high school, Stephanie was frequently referred to as Miss Jackson (her maiden last name) and even complete strangers would yell "I'm sorry Miss Jackson!" Thanks Outcast. It was kind of fun.
9. Stephanie will be voting McCain this election year. Ha! Just kidding. Party like Barack.

10. Songs Stephanie and I know all the words to and often sing when we get together: Weak (SWV), Poison (Belbivdevo), More than Words (Extreme), Salvation Army camp songs, If I Ever Fall... (Shai), and many more.

True story: Stephanie will be in Bellingham in approximately 4.5 hours. Let the singing begin.

New House

2008-09-15T16:43:00.000-07:00

I moved and it was amazing - well, not so much the moving process, but the end result.

#1 - Fun roommates (see previous post)

#2 - I live on another street other than High Street (where I've resided the past 4 years)

#3 - I'm closer to Trader Joe's which I love

#4 - I'm closer to work, which my gas tank loves

#5 - I have a bedroom ceiling that doesn't slope and I can't hit my head on the ceiling everyday

#6 - I have a trailhead across the street which leads to fun places like Whatcom Falls

#7 - It's totally a party house, but a classy party house. I'm so above college-level entertaining.

#8 - My roommate has every season of Friends on DVD

#9 - I have my own bathroom - quite a change from sharing a shower between 6 girls previously (not at the same time, perverts)

#10 - I have converted my previously college-study-computer desk into an art space. Now I can release my inner ghetto pig on a regular basis. I like to art.

Long time

2008-07-23T13:37:00.000-07:00

Oh hey blog. I have been spending time with my less-digital friends lately and have had an absence of creative bloggerage energy...I guess. Well, good things are happening:

I'm moving. That will be a good thing once I find a place to live. I'll be living with some quality individuals - Krizzly Bear and Millard Fillmore (see below). They are nice.

2. I'm not a counselor at Ray of Hope camp this year, which means I have not been hit, kicked, punched, yelled at, or spit on by children this summer. It's an improvement for sure (I do miss the good times though).

3. I'm getting a tan (slowly)...who knew it could happen for me in Bellingham. They should call me bronze beauty pig.

It's a good summer.

Hula Hoop Night

2008-06-18T10:50:00.000-07:00

Aww, I love summer...especially in Bellingham. I know summer is on the way when hula hoop night at Boundary Bay is up and running. I love the outdoor fun of hooping it up with your buddies and, a little later into the evening, reggae-hippie dancing with the crowds. So much fun! Also, Boundary has an amazing Brown Ale that will make anyone have a great ol' time. So, on this 18th of June, just a few days before the official summer solstice, I will be hooping and dancing and, uh, "ale-ing" it up. Also, it is my half birthday, so I will be accepting gifts and cash.

Ghetto Rabbit

2008-06-06T15:34:00.000-07:00

A ghetto pig cannot be hidden, but a healthy ghetto pig cannot be stopped! I've decided in light of my amazing, new vitamin D-filled life, not to mention the fact that summer's on the way, that I am in need of a health kick. Perhaps a health kick in the pants. My office job and winter's gloominess has taken it's toll on my previously pristine body (haha), and I'm ready to start moving more again. And maybe along the way I'll eat some spinach and carrots-I like 'em. I think I'll feel 10,000 times better if I make healthy decisions and on top of that there's all the hotness that will inevitably accompany this journey (have you seen me run in sweats?--Hott!). So here's to sweating like a pig...like a ghetto pig and eating like a ghetto rabbit...hmm. Yeah. I guess that's right.

Readers Make Better Drivers

2008-05-27T15:05:00.000-07:00

Ski to Sea! Woo! Better Lovers! Yeah!

It was a day to remember: On Sunday, May 25, 2008, eight of the Better Lovers took on Ski to Sea. As a fellow Lover and supporter of the team, I volunteered for the driving portion of the race --dropping off the Biker (J. Swob), the runner (Flanhoodles), and the mountaineers (Kris-cross country ski and Lindsay - downhill snowboard). There were some interesting adventures throughout the day--the canoe leg canceled, getting sunburned at the mountain top, running to the finish line to see KJW ring the bell, etc. Perhaps the most unexpected portion of my Ski to Sea experience, however, was my own surprise competition, the Downhill Driving Leg.

As Kris and I began our trek down the mountain in J. Swob's car, Nessie, we realized there were only about 30 miles left to go before we were out of gas. After an hour and a half of slowly, slowly going down the mountain because of all the crazy traffic, we still had roughly thirty miles to go before the next gas station and only 15 miles left of gas. It was time to use my driving skills to conserve. So, on I drove down the mountain, shifting into neutral whenever possible and catching speed at curves to get enough gumption for the straightaways. All seemed lost when we finally reached the town of Glacier and there was not a gas pump to be found. We nearly lost hope, but having faith in Nessie and hope in my skills, I careened further down the mountain until the terrain began to flatten out and become more hilly.

As Lindsay shouted from the back, "I think we're almost to Maple Falls," I saw a HUGE hill come into view. Nessie and I were going to have to take it on if we ever hoped to reach a gas station, but time (and fuel) was running out. I sat low in my seat and shifted into drive as the great hill approached. I placed my hands carefully at ten and two and began to accelerate. After a few minor sputterings, we began to fly up the hill, maintaining enough speed to manage the climb without wavering or puttering out. Yes! We determinedly made it to the crest of the hill, just in time to shift into neutral and ride the next part out. Maple Falls soon came into view and with shouts of joy and wails of victory, we pulled into the cleverly named "Maple Fuels" gas station.

Some have said I am a hero for managing this imperative ski to sea leg, but I'd just call myself a true Lover, a true reader, and a true Ghetto Pig.

Vitamin D

2008-05-09T09:37:00.000-07:00

So, I've been feeling really lethargic, tired, unhappy, blah, for the past few months and now that I have fancy new health insurance, I decided to see the doctor about it. She suggested a blood test among other things and it turns out my vitamin D levels are really low. Hmm, well given that we live in Gloomtown USA for the winter, I wasn't surprised. My doctor said that they've been giving patients vitamin D for similar symptoms and they're feeling better. So, they gave me a MEGADOSE that I only take once a week, and you know what? I'm starting to feel a little sunshiny & peppy again. Hey, vitamin D: you-make-a-me-feel-so-good! Also, in my research to find out more about the magic little vitamin, I found that there's actually a vitamin D society: www.vitamindsociety.org/

That's amazing. I'm thinking of joining.

If you care to know more about vitamin D, read on. If not stop and look at the glorious picture and leave me a comment.

We get vitamin D from sunlight--naturally, living in a climate where sun exposure is limited, it makes sense that one would be deficient. Vitamin D helps your body absorb calcium, helping you to have strong bones. Lack of vitamin D is linked with bone thinning and osteoporosis, but it's also been linked to Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD) and depression. If you think you're vitamin D deficient, you can take a supplement (D3 is most easily absorbed by the body) and load up on vitamin D rich foods, like fortified dairy products and fatty fish. There aren't a lot of Vitamin D rich foods, so a supplement is probably best, but there's always the option of rolling up those sleeves and going outside. Oh, or you can get one of those sunlamps and bask in the light of it. Go vitamin D!

Book it!

2008-04-18T15:18:00.000-07:00

Back in my glory days of juvenile delinquency, there were some protective factors which I believe led my resilience from "going down the wrong track." One of those factors was a little reading program called Book it! Anyone remember this? You had to read a certain amount of books or pages every month, and if you did you got:

A FREE personal pan pizza from Pizza Hut

A Book it! Button and corresponding stickers

Awesome! Who wouldn't want that as a kid? I have to say, I read a lot of books because of this program, and who knows, maybe I wouldn't be the BRILLIANT person I am today without it. Now all I want to know is, what about having Book it! for adults. It's important for adults to read too, and I'd like a button and free personal pan! Come on Book it! Show us some love.

My First Dundie

2008-04-11T13:10:00.000-07:00

Aha, ye-hey, gotmyfirst Dundie! Aha, ye-hey, gotmyfirst DUNDIE!!! (sung to the tune of Wanna Be My Lover --La Buche)

Last night at a highly respected and well-attended Office party, I, Ghetto Pig, recieved the honorable Dundie award. It was supposed to be the Whitest Keds Award, but no one really dressed as Pam, so I recieved the award for the high-class look of Meredith. With my cardigan, swooped bangs, and bottle of Tequila, I took on the true essence of Meredith and, well, people noticed. My stunning trophy is displayed proudly on my cubbie shelf at work. Words cannot express the glory...

It's the freakin weekend baby an' I'm about to have me some fun

2008-04-11T12:53:00.000-07:00

Friday! Ye-yeah! Ghetto P is free. I'm going to be representin in P-town this weekend with nickitynangle. It's gonna be off da hook.

Triscuits: A Lunch Staple

2008-03-31T14:10:00.000-07:00

I am enjoying these little woven wheat bites and I have to say, they have served as a main staple of my lunches for quite awhile now. I can buy a box and store it in a drawer at my desk and there are countless additions I can bring each day for a nutritious meal.

Here are some perfect additions to these little squares of goodness:

cream cheese & red peppers

pepperoni & cheddar cheese (apple slices on the side)

ham & havarti

turkey & swiss

tomato & mozzarella

sharp cheddar & apples

cream cheese & cucumber

And these are just a few. Oh, the awesomeness of semi-processed wheat. Also, Triscuits come in multiple flavors now like Garlic and Tomato Basil. My current favorite is Rosemary & Olive Oil. Yum!

The Server Rules my Life

2008-03-28T13:46:00.000-07:00

So the thing about working in an office is that you are highly dependent on technology - the copiers, printers, computers, brochure folder, etc. When one piece of machinery breaks down, it's like a part of my life is stunted. Well, today I walk into work and the server is down (the system is down, the system is down --strongbad anyone?). Let's talk about the server. It (he?) is pretty much the most important employee in the office. Without him, we cannot use the internet, we cannot access our transfer files (which is where almost all of my stuff is), we cannot access our email, we are pretty much useless. The server brings wholeness to the organization. Don't get me wrong, I enjoyed the social time that commenced in light of the circumstances, and I have to say my desk looks awesome! because of all the time I had to rearrange and clean things, but I felt a little helpless while Mr. Server was out of service. Luckily, about an hour after I got to work, ol' Server was back in business. The world is right again...

2008-03-27T12:30:00.000-07:00

Ghetto Pig.
For all who were wondering.

Oh Hey Ghetto Pig...

2008-03-27T12:18:00.000-07:00

No one thought it could be done...some even warned against it, but yes: I shall blog.
A ghetto pig cannot be hidden.

So, NKR will be bewildered and Baumgal may be overjoyed, and I will go on to share truth with the world--the life and times of Ghetto P.